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Reformed Operator

Jan 22, 2021

Dave (our host) bring Pastor Ben, aka PBR back on as a guest for another assault on your comfort.


//RO Book Recommendation:




J.C. Ryle’s "Thoughts for Young Men"

Free HERE on Monergism


Men struggle with purpose and Ryle addresses this well. He reminds us tomorrow is the devil’s day.


1 Tim 3


Manhood comes at you fast. You will be woefully humbled. Do you have an aim? What are you doing in the places you occupy?


PBR commends the “Fabric of Faithfulness” as another help. 


//RO Main Topic:

Family Worship: Build and Fight by Faith


We dip into a ton of parenting philosophy here, which will be of great help to parents.



Family worship means private worship (4 times a week bare minimum) with your family (or if you don’t have a family you need to do this, even alone)! It is not an option.


Deut 6:5-9





1 Pray (give thanksgiving and repent)

2 Read the passage

3 Talk about the passage

4 Sing

5 Pray (for God to help His Word take root in your hear and you to walk by faith in it)

6 Catechism for the kids AVAILABLE HERE

And if you don't have kids, catechize yourself


Joel Beeke’s Family Worship Bible Guide


Matthew Henry's Family Religion


Child’s Story Bible is also a fantastic supplement for bed time


Persistence pays off. Constant drip of instruction.


Family Worship is helpful in teaching attention and respect to your children. Better strategies will come in time, but just start with the skeleton and do it.


The kids have to understand time, that the time is not theirs. Quiet time is not a punishment, part of the process is training your kids in stillness. It’s a difficult task.


Start small and gradually increase.


The more kids the merrier! Eventually the younger children desire to set the culture and fit in with the culture.


You will object that "my family knows me too well. I can’t lead them." Read Matthew 13:57. Sure, familiarity breeds contempt, but so what. Send it. Do it.


Be relentless. Start, and start, and start again.


The dread of the task is often worse than the task itself. Just do it.


Taxonomy: the study of general principles of scientific classification. Classifying items with a system.


You need to understand the taxonomy of the household. Scripture gives us the clear standards for the taxonomy of the household.


You have expectations of your children, and your kids are individuals. We have to be gracious.


Handling discipline with your kids. Don’t discipline your kids when you are angry. Deal discipline dispassionately. You must not discipline in anger, but rather with the aim of restoration.


Discipline your kids short, early, often, and with aim of restoration. Don’t get exasperated with your children or exasperate them. Usually this exasperation comes from letting things build, rather than addressing them IMMEDIATELY. It's uncomfortable to address your kids immediately. But you need to do it. Short. Early. Often. Repentance and restoration. 


Calvinistic Experiential Knowledge! Paul tells us to raise our children in the nurture (or fear) and admonition and don’t exasperate them. The reasoning for this will become immediately obvious once you are a father.


Dare to be able to fail. And you will. Die well and die daily.


You are a shepherd in your home. You need to care for those in your household. Selflessly care for them by evangelizing and loving them well.




You will fail. You need to repent to your wife and kids. Make a habit of repenting early and often when you have done wrong. Our personal pride and comfort enjoys avoiding discipline and repentance. 




Tactical, Practical, time to get Exactical.



Do not be spoiled by length of service.

Comfort and grit.


“I paid my dues” mentality. Now I can take my ease.


Don’t get soft. Don’t let off the gas.


1 Cor 9:24-27


Learn to execute.


Matt 11:8


Long range shooting, specifically FOLLOW THROUGH.


The end execution and stay strong all the way through the finish. This means being persistent. So you missed the follow through, re-engage. Re-engage. Re-engage.


It’s terrible? Awesome. Deal with it. Laugh.




Laugh about it. Laugh with your wife, laugh with your brothers in Christ. You will see hardship, all the time. But that means you need to have been miserable together in order to grow.


I have the capacity to do this. I can do it.


Stick with it. The J curve is the loss of performance right before a massive spike. Keep going. Don’t stop.


1 Cor 9:25

2 Tim 2


How do you get there? You need to submit to the pain and suffering of the trial. The trials will bring competence. Warriors, Athletes, and Farmers are all used as examples by Paul.


Be Brilliant at the Basics.


Matt 18 is helpful, bring correction early and often. It’s helping your brother out. But the aim is to make your brother better, not to come off as better than your brother. We are in a fight together. We have to help improve one another. It’s healthy to hear correction.


Aim small, miss small. Focused on the target. Know your purpose. To glorify God and enjoy him forever. Read and apply scripture. All of Christ for all of life.


Train and fail, and train and fail, and train and fail. Keep going.


First things first. Read your Bible.


Memento Mori